"Rejection can be redirection, of course. In not getting the thing you thought you wanted, you’re forced to sit with the disappointment and examine your priorities." 🎯
Love this piece Georgina! I went freelance last year and have been struggling to handle the rejection that comes with this ON TOP of the experience of dating — and noticed that they are quite similar feelings. So it’s great to hear I’m not alone in that 😂😍
‘You met your partner back at uni’ haha! Hear that all the time! But that was me too…until it didn’t work out. I feel those pangs of jealousy sometimes when friends whose names were next to mine in scrap books of ‘who’d get married first, buy a flat, have a baby…’ are doing those things. And I am not.
I recognise my frustration as a low moment, since my direction has also been my choice. To them, my life is chaotic, directionless and scrappy. To me, I live freely, travel, get lost, don’t have to compromise or come home. And it’s tough when you face setbacks or rejections. That’s when we crave the stability they have. But we’re still going because the ‘normal’ life - the one we thought we’d have aged 7 watching Disney movies, feels too prescriptive. We choose growth. We choose discomfort. We choose life.
The hardest part in this for me is the rejection I give myself. Not good enough. Try harder. Do better. But to read pieces like this shows we’re all perfectly imperfect - trying, failing, learning. That’s the game of life, isn’t it?
This captured perfectly how I’ve been feeling lately. I launched my very vulnerable Substack and started dating again or rather using the dating apps at the same time. I sort of feel like an exposed nerve ending with the possibility of rejection even though I’ve tried to segregate these two in my mind the feelings are the same. It’s so very hard not to take it personally.
I don’t know if we ever get better at dealing with rejection but it is as you say the price of living freely and in a way that is entirely self directed. Like there’s no blueprint for this stuff and you absolutely have to hold onto your standard otherwise what’s the point of freedom in the first place? I wrote a piece last week on Limerence and since publishing that I feel like a lot of past relationship history stuff has been coming up and to be honest everything is triggering my fight or flight. Which is just to say hard relate, you’re not alone, thanks for writing!
Thank you for your comment! Yes it's weird how putting yourself out there in any regard triggers those fight or flight feelings. Might be a good sign that we're challenging ourselves and pushing out of our comfort zones though. Will check out your Limerence piece but also read this in the Guardian recently about dating without that 'spark' and it's freed me from wanting to chase that high again for now...
"Rejection can be redirection, of course. In not getting the thing you thought you wanted, you’re forced to sit with the disappointment and examine your priorities." 🎯
This is phenomenal.
Thank you!
Love this piece Georgina! I went freelance last year and have been struggling to handle the rejection that comes with this ON TOP of the experience of dating — and noticed that they are quite similar feelings. So it’s great to hear I’m not alone in that 😂😍
Yes they totally are, hope we both learn how to get better at dealing with that, haha
‘You met your partner back at uni’ haha! Hear that all the time! But that was me too…until it didn’t work out. I feel those pangs of jealousy sometimes when friends whose names were next to mine in scrap books of ‘who’d get married first, buy a flat, have a baby…’ are doing those things. And I am not.
I recognise my frustration as a low moment, since my direction has also been my choice. To them, my life is chaotic, directionless and scrappy. To me, I live freely, travel, get lost, don’t have to compromise or come home. And it’s tough when you face setbacks or rejections. That’s when we crave the stability they have. But we’re still going because the ‘normal’ life - the one we thought we’d have aged 7 watching Disney movies, feels too prescriptive. We choose growth. We choose discomfort. We choose life.
The hardest part in this for me is the rejection I give myself. Not good enough. Try harder. Do better. But to read pieces like this shows we’re all perfectly imperfect - trying, failing, learning. That’s the game of life, isn’t it?
Totally agree, it is just a set of different priorities. No set is better or worse than the other.
Can relate!!
thank you! I’m glad someone else gets it!
This captured perfectly how I’ve been feeling lately. I launched my very vulnerable Substack and started dating again or rather using the dating apps at the same time. I sort of feel like an exposed nerve ending with the possibility of rejection even though I’ve tried to segregate these two in my mind the feelings are the same. It’s so very hard not to take it personally.
I don’t know if we ever get better at dealing with rejection but it is as you say the price of living freely and in a way that is entirely self directed. Like there’s no blueprint for this stuff and you absolutely have to hold onto your standard otherwise what’s the point of freedom in the first place? I wrote a piece last week on Limerence and since publishing that I feel like a lot of past relationship history stuff has been coming up and to be honest everything is triggering my fight or flight. Which is just to say hard relate, you’re not alone, thanks for writing!
Thank you for your comment! Yes it's weird how putting yourself out there in any regard triggers those fight or flight feelings. Might be a good sign that we're challenging ourselves and pushing out of our comfort zones though. Will check out your Limerence piece but also read this in the Guardian recently about dating without that 'spark' and it's freed me from wanting to chase that high again for now...
Hope you find it useful too:
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2025/jan/05/a-very-nice-man-is-interested-in-me-but-i-dont-feel-a-spark